Beaver one, Beaver all...

Tonight, as I was driving on the dreaded Seattle-Portland slog, I finished my audiobook and was forced to be alone with my thoughts. This drive always brings that out - miles and miles of solitude. I've avoided it for a long time, never knowing what my brain would conjure up.

Tonight my thoughts turned to the conversation I'd had with Jackie earlier, about my strong defense over my Beavers. There are only 2 things that will do that to me, my family and my Beavers.  Make fun of or question my alligiance to either, particularly when first meeting me, and you will have removed yourself from me further than the grand canyon is wide. Even now I can feel my defenses going up, my heart rate rising, my bristles coming out.  I'm like a momma bear who is growling at the person who looked at my cub wrong.

I began to think that this was slightly unnatural. I mean, I didn't go to Oregon State, why do I get so defensive?  I thought about how far back my memories go...all the way back to when I was an ugly little girl (and I say that mostly because what I remember people telling me about is how funny I looked in my big glasses...like it was something I could control at the age of 3, but I digress). I remember playing on the basketball court with my cousin, sitting at the football games being entertained by the helmet races on the screen, collecting bottles after the games, having dinner with the family, traveling to bowl games. And as I was driving and thinking, it clicked.

My team is the only true connection I have to my family. The only part of me left that I share with them, the only honest part of me they see. I can't share the rest of me, so this is the only thing left.  The only thing we have in common, what we talk about on the phone, the only reason I come back for more than holidays.  It's sad really, but I suppose it's true. And I guess the real reason I get so defensive, is because it seems like people are trying to sever that last thread, cutting me off from my family completely. The last piece holding me off from becoming an orphan...

So the next time I seem to get overly Beaver crazy, part is because of my loyalty, but the other part is because I still want some connection to my parents, I guess I'm not ready to give up that last thread of hope that I have a family that I can feel a part of...

Life Expected

Sometimes your day is boring and dull, sometimes, it's just fully unexciting.  And then, there are those days when it is great.  But there are those OTHER times where your day, your night, your weekend are amazing.

I had that recently.  I was bored with life.  It was dissatisfying, I was unhappy....depressed.  And then on Thursday night I had dinner with my friend.  A friend who you wouldn't ever give up on, no matter what happened.  A friend who reminds you that it takes work to be a friend and to keep a friend.  Man, was dinner with my wife on Thursday awesome.  And then, I got to repeat it all again on Friday.

Friday...Lynsey and I met up at a wine bar in Post Alley, we were flying solo because of sick or boyfriend sick friends...never mind that, we were together.  Chatting, drinking wine flights, having chocolate and a grand ole time.  One more drink we decided, at a fantastic bar called White Horse... and that one more drink kicked our lil' asses right into the Post... where we bemused, befuddled and bewildered all those Nebraskan boys.  There was nothing but giggles and kisses on our end.

And you could have said my good day ended then...with me waking up the next morning 45 min AFTER my flight had departed. But somehow, it didn't.  The fun times were still rolling along... right with Oregon State beating Louisville (and of course, I think of Elizabethtown every time I say that word, because there are SO many versions of it).  After a little Qdoba with the fam, I headed back north, listening to my book on tape the whole time.... at Gervais I stopped to change into my "going out" attire... skinny cargoes and a hot top... the heels would join my feet later.

Saturday night in Portland was great... it was different from Seattle... not quite as busy and hot to trot, but great all the same. And with Jodie and her friends, we inevitably ended up at Kells, just like any great night would.  Kells provided cigar bars, Celtic bands and Guinness.  Along with drunk couples, sweaty girls and dancing the Irish gig.  Me and my 9" heels finally joined in and had a fantastic time dancing the gig joined with 10 other drunk, happy, pretend-Irishmen.

The night ended, and we all went our separate ways... no one too drunk, but no one too sober either.  I parked, found my bed and slept happily until 5:30am...when Meredith (my car) decided to let me know someone was touching her (you know, in that way in the courts when they give the doll to the child and ask "where did the bad man touch you" kinda way).  I heard her, looked out the window, hoped it wasn't... and then heard her again - they were towing cars on the street I'd parked.  Meredith was being violated, and she was letting the world know.  On went the shorts and shirt, and out the door I went.  Jiggles had nothing on me.  I found the man hurting Mer and begged him to let me park her elsewhere... this man happened to be a friend from college... irony at 530 was more than I could deal w/...especially as the hot mess I had to be...

So Mer and I drove around, and finally found a space in the visitors lot far away...woke up to cheers from the "Race for the Cure" supporters...once showered and coherent, breakfast was had.  Now you have to understand that Portland, Oregon has THE BEST breakfast places in the world.  This morning the Veritable Quandary was chosen... and 7 of us gathered around the round table of King Arthur,  I mean King Veritable, and had our various French Toast brioche, eggs benedict (with or without crab), or corned beef hash... along with VQ-8, Espresso or Champagne cocktails....and an incredibly healthy dose of laughter.  Honestly, I haven't had that great a time laughing and communing with friends since God knows when.  The day was capped off with a tour of the Saturday Market (including hilarious boxers and insanely intelligent art).

My weekend ended with a bang...I finished my Stephen King novel on the drive home.  I mean...and really, that story ended with a bang of a finish.  All I know is that fantastic weekends are still possible and I want more of them.  I had drinks with Sofia tonight.....and then realized that the night was young enough to still have drinks with Lynsey.  If that's not a great way to end a Monday, I don't know what is.

All I can say is that if my life may be boring and dull sometimes, it more than makes up for it when it is exhilarating and fantastical.  I wouldn't trade it for the world, I just have to think that my poor future kids will get tired of hearing, "I remember when"...:)

Paris - the arrival (part 1)

Well, it has been a crazy past month, but I'm starting to get the picture that my life is always like this.  And it seems that the crazier it gets, the more stories I have to tell, and yet, the less I make it to a computer.  So maybe a quick catch-up? (and I'm seeming to get internet from someone at my apartment, so hopefully the blogging bug will hit me more at home, and less in the car on the ride home)

Just over a month ago, I took a leap and left my job.  Now don't get too worried (because some people did give me that look when I said I quit my job), I already had another one lined up.  And so far, yeah, it has been a fantastic move.

My final 2 weeks at Alaska were literally a whirlwind!  I interviewed on Wednesday, heard back that day that they liked me, got my offer, gave my acceptance and my resignation on Thursday - and left for Paris on Friday!

Paris was awesome - 4 days all to myself.  Getting on the flight was hairier than a French armpit, but I made it.  I watched enough movies both on the flight there and the flight back to practically make the ticket a moot point.  I think I got 4 in both ways? (yeah, that is what I said)  I beat that on the flight to Germany - 5.  Either way, the screaming baby did not help me sleep and the ear plugs did no good.  I landed safely in Paris (and let me say, I really think Lufthansa is the best international airline... Air France well, it was so-so.  I felt like I was just in their way... no chocolate or refills.  I had to get them on my own!  Sock-footed and climbing over someone both ways).

I got off the plane and got my stamp to say I officially was in Paris.  Wow, bouncing off the walls!  I found the RER, bought tickets and was off to my little hotel (seriously, little).

I even successfully avoided the beggars looking to "help" tourists.  How traveled am I?  And when I got off the RER and exited the station, who should meet me, but Ms. Notre Dame herself.  Wowza! Nothing beats that.  Off I set, in what I thought was the right direction, but probably 10 blocks later, I stopped, asked for directions and was forced to walk the other way.

Sweaty, hungry and sleepy, I arrived at my hotel and promptly took a nap.  Yes, I know, 4 days and I sleep?!  But I needed it.  When I awoke, well, the heavens could smell me, so I set off on my next adventure - the shower.  Wow... if I wasn't in the shower, I would have say it would have been the funniest thing you've ever seen.  It was smaller than most motor home's showers, and the plastic curtain was made to fit a full-size tub.  The water... wouldn't stay the correct temperature and I left the door open so the breeze combined with heat emanating from the sometimes scalding water forced the curtain to stick to me.  There was no place to put shampoo, conditioner, or soap near you, so you had to bend down - with shower curtain sticking.  Umm, wonder if they ever clean those?  And don't forget that the water has suddenly gone freezing cold so you must get it off as quickly as possible...ok, well, I finally finished.  And thankfully stepped out of that death trap.


On to drying my hair... with a hair dryer that resembled a mini-vacuum cleaner.  If my hair wasn't so short, it would have taken a year to dry.  Plus, the nozzle got too hot to hold, so finishing the job was difficult. ;-).

Finally dressed and ready to go, I headed out.  First stop, food.  I think I passed 5 cafes before I was finally like, damn it, sit down!  So I breezed into the next one, and the waiter promptly gave me a bathroom token and pointed.  Perplexed, I started to head in that direction, only to stop, turn back and have him point me downstairs.  Geez... lucky for the lady in the bathroom without the token, I didn't have to go.  Up the stairs I went again, and told the guy (in pointing motions) I wanted a seat.  Light bulb! Oh, stupid American, just sit anywhere (no, he didn't say that but I'm sure he thought it).  My ability to order food was just about as pathetic.  The menu was in French (duh) and so I opted for the easy option - I'll have the special (that way, I could point).  Note to self - never ask for the special when you have no idea what it is.  It was a strange fish mashed potato with a slice of something the size of a sardine on top.  And when in Rome... I ate it all.  Cutting the fish thing into 3 pieces, the first bite awful, the second bite caused and intense gag, and the third bite - well, I'm surprised I didn't throw up in that cafe right there!  It was one of the worst meals I've eaten, so much for French food.

What will happen next?  Will I lose my lunch and wish I'd saved that bathroom token?  Will I retreat to my room for a nap?  Do I even survive!?!

Just hang loose,

Just have fun,

Sitting on the beach

Lying in the sun.

Don't try to fight it cause it ain't no use!

Cause when you're in Kauai

You just hang loose!

Ok, so that probably means nothing to anyone other than me or my family, but that's what I was thinking the plane ride over.  Since the last time I was there was Christmas in... the 90s with all the Ditgen's.  And my lovely aunt and uncle taught us lil' girls this song.  And finally, almost 20 years later, I was headed there again.  This time alone, for a much shorter time and thankfully without 11 inches of rain.

Friday afternoon I was like a kid waiting to go to Disneyland.  I was ready for some sunshine and time away from work and normal life.  I'd been convinced to rent a car (definitely recommended) and was loaned a guidebook that lead me to the beach you see above.  A complimentary mai-tai, and I was good to go!

I arrived late Friday night...after getting my car and directions to my hotel, off I went...to the wrong hotel.  I pulled up thinking, wow, this place actually looks pretty nice.  And after a bit of a wait in line to check in, I get to the desk agent who promptly tells me that my hotel is another 8 miles down the road... fantastic!  Ha, I finally get to my hotel (its around 8:40 by now), and felt like I'd walked into a completely different world... the Aston Kauai is not what you'd call "luxury", but it was clean and it would do.

I opted for the cheaper garden view, and noted a lovely patch of automobiles out my window.  Huh, didn't know they were in season!  But I was top floor and there were vaulted ceilings, so it redeemed itself slightly.  Well, by the time I got changed and adjusted it was after 9.  I guess Cinderella's coach turns into a pumpkin here at 9 and not 12.  No food was served in the bar, and not much was open close by.  My waiter kindly offered me a salad and I had a gin & tonic (very tropical, I know).

Saturday morning, I found a great cafe on my way to the Waimea Canyon and had a fantastic pancake at the Tip Top cafe.  I left there (after being the lonely single person at a 4-top table) and drove out to the canyon.  

It was a pretty great morning for it, slightly overcast, just warm enough.  And the canyon was beautiful (but a little much when you only have a day in Kauai).  I drove around, flipping through radio stations, trying not to bottom out my little Nissan Versa in the myriad of potholes, enjoying getting out at the few checkpoints and running into uber friendly Hawaiians (well, really just one lady).

And of course, since food is the most important part of a vacation, I HAD to get me some Shave Ice!  After many insights into the "best spot", I took the Kauai guidebook's advice and headed to Jo-Jo's.  What I ordered was a tad odd... not a big fan of chewy cubes or long stringy coconut pieces, but overall, it hit the spot.

On I drove, having to make a stop back at the hotel to grab the right credit card, more cash, and hopefully my camera (which again, I forgot, thus, all the pictures you see were taken by my iPhone, good thing it takes decent shots, right?).

All I wanted was a beach... so I drove north to get to one... I wasn't super thrilled with what I picked, but there was sand and water... so I stayed for awhile and then moved on to find the perfect, secluded beach (the pic at the top). MUCH better! And despite the steep trail, I made it down and back up injury free :)

And doesn't it always stand to reason that the moment you determine you're gonna just lay there on your hotel towel (yes, I snuck it out :) hehe) and you decide you don't want lines on your back... that someone decides to come talk to you?!  So there you  lay, top untied, and you know it won't be easy to retie it with someone watching, so instead, you lay there face-down hoping that you don't accidentally raise up too much and praying that the conversation with this nice gentleman does not last forever. Well, that is exactly what happened to me... but I DID glean great information - George Clooney was currently filming on the island... mmm :)  How else can a tropical island get any better?  Put 2 of former world's sexiest men alive on it (Johnny Depp was filming there as well)!  Sadly, I did not run into anyone famous.

After sun bathing (and of course, you know that as soon as the dude walked away, I retied my top, I was not getting myself into THAT predicament again!), I went to my car to perform a quick change and headed to the Princeville Hotel.  

I walked in, still trying to shake the last remnants of sand onto their super polished floor, and found a comfy chair to watch the sun slowly descend while sipping on a fantastic pineapple mojito. And I left just in time to see the sun set outside. 

At this point, I'm at a cross-roads.  I want to go see Hanalei, but its getting late, I need both dinner and gas (I'd wanted Costco gas, but well, people on the North Shore don't seem to venture south much and didn't know how late Costco was open...grrr).  After some indecision, I decided to head back south - I was NOT going to miss having dinner 2 nights in a row, and it was 7 by the time I was leaving... yikes, I was going to be pushing it - AGAIN!  I stopped at "home" to change, and oh yeah, my phone ran out of juice on my way back - awesome!  So I let it charge for a whole 10 min before heading out the door to head to Duke's (what I had read was a good place for food).  And after some circling around trying to figure out how to get there - the map and the iPhone were not super helpful since it was IN the hotel (the parking attendant was not helpful either).  I was stressing a little getting there, it was getting closer to 9 when food seemed to magically disappear.

Sigh, I found it... and a seat at the bar between a couple dudes (imagine that). And I also found out where all the people around Kauai hide!  I was beginning to think no one was even UP past 9!  Of course, it turned into a later night than I wanted, but I had a great time.

The flight out the next day worked as well (even down to the part where I was given the window seat, and not the middle seat between 2 large people... sitting next to them ok, between, well, I'm not Wan, I don't like that "cozy" feeling).  I wished I'd stayed 1 more day, and that I'd just laid on the beach all day Saturday, but there's always next time right?  (plus, you get strange looks from people when you tell them you're just there for the day ;-))

Aloha!

Edward or Jacob?

To begin with, I apologize for neglecting my blog.  Work has become... nothing short of a pain, and staying around late to write a blog hasn't been top on my priority list (plus, the locations I've been working at blocked my blog... as something like "obscene/tasteless" ;-)).

And now, I've got something on my mind, and a little down time, so I guess I'll share.  Plus, writing helps me process things (that and getting sufficient sleep).  One way or another, people are going to be unhappy with my decision, but I gotta be me, right?  I mean, if I'm not happy, I am definitely a pain in the ass to be around.

You're probably thinking, what the pho are you talking about Natalie?  Get to it!  Ok ok, so I've been debating my living situation.  Portland is calling, and my heart flutters at the thought of it.  But I've started to put down roots in Seattle, I have a great friend base and great coworkers, I like my living situation (ummm I love living downtown in the heart of all the action), and I haven't yet been pulled over for having Oregon plates, yet.

The best way I can describe my feelings, and thus the impossibly difficult decision, is to compare them to Twilight.  I know, I'm a total Vamp dork, but analogies help my lil' logical mind wrap my head around the situation.

On one hand there's Portland - which is totally my Edward.  Edward has my heart.  I feel like I was ripped from his hands (not by choice but by circumstances "out" of my control), and when I'm around my family there or things are bad here, I think of him.  And trust me, this is often.  The pain has subsided (or at least been masked a little), and I don't cry every time I leave Portland, but still, I could if I let myself.  And the other week, as I was sitting with my girlfriends at the Tegan & Sara concert, I felt truly at home and peaceful, I knew I belonged to Edward.  Like we were meant for each other.  Edward definitely makes me grow up a little, I feel like I will be settled with him.  But am I ready to be settled?!?

And then there's Seattle - definitely Jacob :).  Irresistible.  Hard to turn down.  Heated and dangerous (see the numerous girls night picts from fb).  But on days like today, he's just a total brat (namely because of the j-o-b).  Jacob's the fun one.  The one I go out with late at night to tear up the town.  The one who's encouraged me to get out, make friends, move on from Edward.  He's been great.  I've grown to love him.  But I think he knows, he'll always play 2nd fiddle to Edward.

So, where does that leave me?  I don't want to give Jacob up, but I desperately want to be with Edward.  Can I have both?  And if I have a baby, will Jacob fall for her?;-)  Is it just cuz I've been in a place for 2 years and I'm antsy?  Sigh, if only I knew the answer...I know, that's part of the journey and just a part of life.  I'm kinda waiting for it to hit me across the head (and no wife, just cuz you hit me, does not mean I'll choose Jacob).  

What it really comes down to is time. I'm not in a rush, and Portland won't be falling into the ocean like California will, so I should be good.  At least, I hope Rocky's song isn't true... I guess that's what I've been thinking lately.  I'll keep you posted.  ~NattyJo

How to Meet Guys: 101

A few months back, finding myself newly single and pondering the age old question - how does one go about meeting men?  Of course, all taken friends have their suggestions, and some happen to be internet dating.  And while I have no qualms against it, I'm not ready to admit defeat just yet. I'd like to think I still have it in me to find a guy in person....  So my options are limited, I haven't found a church I like, work - well, let's just say: "don't sh*t where you eat" should be followed, and the hobbies I like... not so sure I WANT to meet a guy who knits, scrapbooks, or is in love with Edward Cullen...;-).

Little did I know that by posing this question to the universe, that the universe would respond back with a smack-in-the-face of "this is how b*tch".  Ok, well maybe it wasn't that forceful, but definitely, don't ask if you don't want an answer.

Now, I believe that things happen for a reason and I'm always open to meeting people and up for something new (obviously, or how else would I have met the lovely Mr. Dempsey!?, trust me, you meet no one in your hotel room, unless you're into the housekeeping ladies, which I, am not, instead you meet them in your hotel gym ;-P).  Ok, let me put a caveat to that "open to meeting people" - I don't do blind dates/ set-ups.  I am not up for these, no matter "how amazingly awesome" he is.  If I must meet him, at least attempt the "nonchalant meeting", please, save me from the insanity of blind dates!  (unless of course I get to have those little bubbles coming out with my thoughts!)

In the past 6 months, I have met guys in some normal and some of the most unconventional ways (which is which, well, I'll let you be the judge :) - like the taxi driver who gave me his personal number after dropping me off one night - umm creepy, he knows where I live and has me trapped in his sticky cab!).  But thinking back, compared to other times in my life, the recent meetings aren't any more unusual than normal for me (such as rock climbing with Cheri, meeting a couple guys, and going to the Shanghai Tunnel (skipping in our gym clothes) for some stout and mac'n'cheese after...)

Case in point, I've both flirted with and gotten phone numbers while driving... though I think we only talked on the phone that once, I still remember him trying to communicate his number to me w/ his hands... only to realize that he kept leaving out the area code - which wasn't 503 as expected, but 360, dude, those 3 numbers are important!  While most times, flirting with the guy (or sometimes just the car itself, haha), I've at least gotten a wave of acknowledgement and a coy smile :-).

There's the "standard" bar scene - which obviously hasn't lead to anything permanent, but has yielded some friends (namely those residing in Sin City).  I did find the "you look bored" line amusing, especially when he asked if I was going to end up blogging about him, sorry dude, this is all ya get.  I mean, what kind of people hang out in bars, seriously?;-)

I also enjoy meeting bartenders mostly cuz they can't get away from me;-) haha, j/k.  But no, not really, I like that they have to talk to me...

Probably, the most amusing recently was the guy from the shuttle bus - ha! Just admitting that "out loud" makes me laugh.  I mean, who seriously gives their number to a guy from a shuttle bus?  Apparently "this girl" (points to self with thumbs).  Even worse, after he'd taken my number (and I'd driven away), apparently it didn't save and he had to ask the MasterPark for my name (shame on you MasterPark for giving it out!) and he then proceeded to find me on LinkedIn.  Gotta give the guy props for the follow-through (unlike the waiter at a restaurant who memorized my name from the receipt and looked me up on MySpace - claiming it was unusual so it was easy to remember... ask me for my number next time, stalker...).

There are the few guys I've met at concerts, which seems like a good place - instant common interest!  But my luck there runs thin (anyone remember Texty!?), not to mention the guy I met at the Rocky Votolato concert the other night - this dude's friend's decided it would be amusing to pretend he was someone famous.  Gotta admit, his one friend was fairly annoying about the whole thing...seriously, they went as far as to have people come up and take pics with him... I guess it takes all types, right? (so if you ever meet a guy by the name of Ian, he isn't, nor has he ever been famous... don't let him or his bored friends mess with you)

Who knows, I keep hoping my braveness (also interchangeable for stupidity) will lead me to the man of my "dreams", and if worst-comes-to-worst at least more amusing adventures :)!!

This Day is Out to Get Me!

This is definitely one of those days that if I hadn't have been in SUCH a good mood, I would be pissy and cranky.

I woke up at 5:52 am - 8 min prior to my alarm going off - this is one of my LEAST favorite things, I value sleep and want to squeeze every minute of it like getting that last drop of juice from a grapefruit.  But I know why I woke up - I was uncomfortably warm and needed water - thank you alcohol for the lovely dehydration you granted me!  And as I laid there, I fought with myself - do I get up, read my Bible (gasp, I know) and workout or do I hit the snooze button.  Getting up at this point would still leave me PLENTY of time and I'd probably be to work early as a result.  Because normally, I like to snooze for exorbitant amount of time - 1 1/2 hrs some days.  Well, the lazy side won - and snooze until 7:30 it was... hey, I didn't have a meeting until 9:30 - this was my tired self justifying my lazy a$$.

Either way, I'd decided what I wanted to wear - my white pants - it feels springy and happy and I knew I'd seen an idea of how to wear them on this fashion blog - awesomeness, you should check it out - http://www.frugal-fashionistas.com/.  The outfit was modified to what I have, but still, I think it works?  Confidence is definitely an accessory :) haha.

Coffee was next on my agenda - and of course I had to throw it out to coworkers, and got Beth's order in perfect time to add it to mine (a tall, 1 pump vanilla, whole milk, light caramel, caramel macchiato - this is a treat cuz some mornings, all I can get out is - tall vanilla latte).  Sigh, happiness.  Plus my ipod was playing some great music - oh wait, it's MY music... who needs pandora? :) - Sam's Town was giving me happy thoughts of the Killers concert, and I was rockin' out!

But as I was about to turn to work... I heard my phone - Wan texted how much she appreciated the offer... well, I couldn't leave her hanging and it wasn't quite 9 yet, plus, I justified, I needed breakfast and kleenex.  So off I drove to the Safeway.

Donut holes, kleenex, some draino (for home, not Wan's coffee), bananas and coffee later... I was back in the car.  Well, mistake - I had the drip coffee (thank the Lord it was only drip and not some sugary sweet/ milkiness) in the carrier by itself and on flipping a bitch.... it decided to flip one as well!  Crap!  Ok, put it upright... no napkins were available, so I rolled down the window and watched the coffee slosh :(.  No worries, I'd get it at work - still smiling.

Got to work, cleaned my car (I think Meredith liked the coffee, some had sunk in already...), and got ready for the 9:30 meeting (including getting some donut holes, they were rolly polly little buggers and a couple escaped my grasp :().  It wasn't raining, so we walked :).  The meeting ended early - woohoo! and I got to my desk in time for the Dbrief (cpe training on fraud, super fun!).  And while I was listening, I decided to check mint (yes, I am addicted, LOVE IT!) - hmmm, what's this RC Railway in AZ?!  And for $584 bucks!?  Yikes!  Well, turns out its a super nice hotel at the Grand Canyon - one that I did not visit.

A quick call to BofA - and withing 15 min, they were telling me they would credit my account, cancel the card and send me a new one! No disputing, no questioning... just believing me! Wow, gotta say, much appreciated!!  Though this will have been the 2nd credit card number I've memorized and had to give up due to some fraud... :-(

And now I'm smiling to some new music (Train's - Hey, Soul Sister - it was amazon's mp3 deal of the day, so the CD was only $2.99!) and waiting for Jon & Gayle to bring me my Vietnamese chicken sandwich - yum!  This day is not going to steal my joy! :)

Shane Co Away!

Ok, so maybe that title didn't work as well in writing as it did in my head, but it amused me enough to be retained as the blog heading.

I know we've ALL heard the Shane Co commercials on the radio, and can probably quote the ending line for line w/ the announcer (...Shane Co, off of Hwy 217 across from the Washington Square Mall, open weekdays til 8, Saturday and Sunday til 5, online at Shaneco.com...).  
Yes, they are annoying, not to mention all the other jewelry ads we have to put up with - Fred Meyer, EE Robbins, and the dreaded Jared the Galleria of Jewelers (I'd rather let a carnivorous earwig eat my brain out).

They are usually just white noise and I don't like to station surf if I don't have to, so most of the time I put up with them.  Though I have to say, after my breakup, I couldn't and would change the station immediately (come on, it was like salt in the wound, a carrot in front of my face that I could never have... mean!).  But I got over that and it's been fine.  Until last night...

I'm not sure what it was that caused me such pain, but it was like a stab in the back, a scab picked off that hadn't healed fully.  The commercial was addressing the far distance to drive to Lynnwood, WA to get an engagement ring.  And Mr. Tom Shane in his monotone drawl, was saying it was worth it for their direct diamond imports that save you money (don't you tell me you don't have a friend in the diamond business!).

And his last line was something like: "isn't your girlfriend worth the drive" and my first thought was no, I mean, really, to a certain someone, I wasn't even worth the diamond let alone the excessive drive to get one.  I don't say this to be completely bitter, but he really did complain to me about the cost of a ring, many many times (its not the size or price that matters, its the meaning, right?).  So I just have to say that stupid commercial just reopened the wound that said "I wasn't worth it"...and now, I will return to my boycotting of those wretched commercials and their unintended reminders of my worth or implied lack thereof.

The Dating Game...

Well, I've been meaning to get this one out for awhile now (that's what she said? - Jason, you'll have to let me know if that was appropriate or not...it's feeling a little limp to me;-))...and be prepared, this guy was nice, but well, it's turned into something that Really Grinds My Gears... :)

Being as I've been single for going on 7 months now, and having a few dates here and there, but nothing to write home about (not that I would anyway...), I decided at the Phoenix concert, I would give out my number and try going on a date with a guy (I mean, really, if you don't try, you'll never know right?).  I know, I was being brave, but little did I know what I would be getting myself into....

For purposes of anonymity, we'll call this guy Fred.  Fred did the polite thing and gave me a call Sunday after the concert (I didn't answer, as I was with Jackie all day, plus, I have to admit, I am a phone screener, I hate talking on it, so why would I want to talk to a person I didn't know?! Unless I get to pretend to be a scary guy named Stewie who likes to pick up guys in my car...).  There were probably a couple of red flags I should have heeded from the concert

1. he was there with a group of friends, and his ex-gf happened to be there as well, he had to hide that he was getting my number, I'd had a little alcohol, my senses were a little off, and 
2. he asked if I gave him a fake, and then referenced that when he texted me later - not sure I've met too many confident guys who worry about that...).  

I hate listening to/ returning phone calls, I avoid it like the plague, so it said something that this guy was willing to pursue since he texted me on Monday (or it says desperate, you be the judge).  Now, I have to say, that I have been guilty of this before, and it always throws me back to "he's just not that into you"... but when you look through your chat screen, it should be about an 1 to 1 ratio, give or take a few.  I mean, really, if you are going to have a chat conversation, make it that.  If you want an answer to a question, let the person answer before asking the next question...but I digress...(and for all those non-iphone users out there, my messages are in green :))

I agreed to a date for that coming Friday night (and I wasn't happy to be giving up my Friday night to this guy, but no other night was available) - you can't tell about a person strictly from a text, I'd give him a shot.  But as the week wore on, and I got worn out by the text conversation (I mean, it was like he was trying to get to know me via text, dude, wait for the date!  I don't really wanna play 20 questions ALL FREAKING DAY!).
Friday came... and boy was I not looking forward to this date, I was beyond annoyed, and I'd made get out plans with Jackie.  My poor coworkers had to hear about this, and I'm sure were amused at my antics (I'm sure this single girl provides lots of amusement, maybe its just my plight in life?).  I asked where we were going, hoping to just meet up (I mean, who gets in a car w/ a stranger, I would *never* do something like that... haha, ok, that's a lie).  So Fred asked:

Either way, the date went actually ok.  He was a very nice guy, we had a nice dinner at the Icon Grill, and I was feeling ok to keep hanging out for a drink after, plus the half bottle of wine had me happy.  I wrote off the mad texting to the "he was just nervous" category... and ok with the idea of date 2, but not willing to go out of my way to make it happen (should have been another flag to me, as I believe that you make time for what you want to do, no matter how busy you are... case in point, I'm hanging out w/ a friend tonight to watch Family Guy :), even though I already have plans M, Th, and F).

So I hadn't committed to any times/ dates, etc, as I really didn't know what I had going on, and didn't really want to fill up every night, plus I knew I had plans to eventually see Avatar with Wan, collect on drinks from my Fantasy Football win, and umm, relax like a normal person! :)  Last week was much the same, so I wasn't quick on the response (and there was one night where I made it clear I was just getting home from work at 7, and wasn't feeling well, and he was like psycho crazy texter that night), and this past weekend I was out of town all weekend with K :) (see blog here).

I was beginning to realize his interest in me was a lot more than mine in him... he's looking for a serious relationship, whereas, I'm like seriously, do I want to be in a relationship?!  Another case in point - his worry about my responding to texts...

I left my phone at work last night, eh, no biggie, I've figured out how to use the oven timer to wake me up in the morning, but let me tell you, trying to snooze that way isn't very fun... ;-)... this also means, I wasn't getting any messages, no biggie for most normal, secure people, right?  I think the unread messages this morning might have pushed me over the edge...

And now, I'm not sure where to go... I really don't want a second date, but I kinda said yes before...how do I let him down? I've never been known to stick around for freebies... (or else I would have had some clothes from Brooke Burke...but that's another story), so putting up with this for a possible date next week seems out of the question.  But I would really like this monkey off of my back... as I'm pretty sure I'm not interested, because in comparison, when I am, responding makes it's way to the top of my list, and I look forward to hearing back from that person.  But Fred hasn't given me that chance, he's always 1st to text me, I like to feel like I have room to reciprocate the feelings.  Ok, I've reached the end of my rant, suggestions are more than welcome!

What is the difference between 10:55 and 10:35?

Ahh!  After a looong week at work (and boy, do I mean long!) and fighting a yucky little cold, the weekend had FINALLY arrived.  Friday night started it off right with a great concert at the Showbox SoDo with K.  Jack’s Mannequin put on a great show, I love a band that is talented and (at least seemingly) humble.  We called it an early night and agreed to meet up at 9:15 to head to the airport, for our 10:55 flight to Victoria.

 

The morning started out fairly productive for the both of us – I got a workout in, and K was able to get her coffee and breakfast (in retrospect, I should have skipped the workout and gone for the coffee first thing).  We arrived at my work parking lot, braved running across International Blvd, and while waiting for the shuttle, I decided to make sure our flight looked ok – urh-oh!  The flight was at 10:35! Yipes!!  It was currently 9:40… ok, I thought, no biggie… you only have to be there 30 min prior to the flight to check in… we’d be ok.

We arrived at the airport, tried the kiosk… and gulp, it was too late (hmmm, lesson #1 you must check in 1 hr prior to departure on an international flights!!)!  Ok, no biggie – I know how to circumvent this – list for the next flight and then have them switch us to the earlier flight when we get to the gate.  Time waster #1 – the kiosk wouldn’t print our passes….so we went to the agent – she was able to get our tickets and we were back on track going through security.

Lesson #2 always check your gate, cuz regardless of how many times you fly, it’s always best to know where you’re going (and international flights leave out of a different part of the terminal).  Time waster #2 - but we didn’t check, and I needed coffee, so I got some coffee and K got some magazines.  We walked to the C gates and I realized, oh shit… the Victoria flight is usually out of the south satellite.  So with full coffee in hand we booked it about as fast as any Ditgen’s have.  We didn’t push past the people going down the escalator (time waster #3) and JUST missed the train.  But the time was just 10:15… so really, they just started boarding at 10:10 (the standard 25 min before for them).

We raced up the escalators to see our gate and it was … deserted.  There was no one around.  The door was shut.  It was still 10 min prior to take-off, and the plane was outside getting ready to depart.  Seriously!?!?!?!  We debated on what to do… it was 4 hours until the next flight.  We figured we’d at least head back to the main terminal, and on the way, we checked how full that next flight was…there were zero seats available.  Karissa suggested, hey, we could just drive.  It’s only like 4 hours…and we’d make it up there before the next flight even departed.  Ok, let’s do that.  Then we won’t have to cab it or anything.  Yeah! This sounds like a decent idea!

So we called back the hotel shuttle, got in the car, set up the ipod, searched the directions and off we went!  Road trip!  Cool huh?  It was a beautiful day, and we’d see places we’d never been before.  Around noon, I was like, hey, we should check what time the ferry is to know if we needed to hurry or dilly-dally.  And the futile search began…lesson #4 there is only one ferry (the Victoria Clipper) that goes to Victoria in the beginning of February.  We somehow found the “magical” weekend from Port Angeles, where the Washington state ferries were out for 10 days on dry-dock and the private ferry didn’t begin service until May. 

Ok, well, there’s still another option - Anacortes!  Maybe we can just head there; it’s not super far… We had gotten all the way to Poulsbo at this point, and while trying to find a place to pull over to figure out directions, we saw a fish park – cool we’re road tripping, photo shoot!  

We then turned into McyDs to get a soda and some fries (we still had a couple hour drive ahead of us, we needed sustenance – and just wanted to say, one of us got 1 fry, while the other had the rest… ).  Bad news - the ferry from Anacortes didn’t start until May either!!! WTF?!?!?  How do people get off that island in the winter?  Well, we weren’t about to drive to up to Vancouver and over…. Sooooo I guess we’ll take a look at the flight?

Ok, there were 2 seats available… and we were getting up there!  We had an uncancellable hotel, so I did what I figured was the best option given our luck – and used my “precious” positive space passes (I mean, really, the whole thing was my bad) – and finally, we had confirmed seats to Victoria :).  It was a little after noon at this point, and we were back our way to Seatac.  Karissa decided to be a little more proactive and check in online… and no go.  Ok, let’s call reservations and have them check us in over the phone!  Ummm, they told us we had to do so at the airport and a supervisor would be needed.  At this point, we’re feeling the time crunch…we knew we needed to be at the airport at least 1 hr in advance to check in…and it was getting late.

I have never purposely sped so much in my life.  Our giggles over the ridiculous-ness of this situation started to subside and the realization that we could not make it started to sink in (oh and we both started to have to use the bathroom, as we’d both had coffee and hadn’t stopped at the airport).  Drive Meredith like you’ve never driven before!  Our plan was set, we’d go to the departures, I’d jump out and go start the check in process while K parked the car in the airport garage – making it was more important than the cost at this point.

Yikes! The Customer Service line was long…I think, maybe, just maybe I’ll be able to use the kiosk.  And thank the Lord… It worked (it was rather odd though, it’s like it remembered us because, well we were supposed to be on that 1^st flight and it didn’t require our passports to be scanned).  With both boarding passports in hand, all I had to do was wait for Karissa to come back.  We met up, made it through security, went straight to the gate, and checked in with the gate agent (who lectured us on not being there before – trust me, WE WANTED TO BE!). 

After 4 hours of unnecessary stress and hilarity, we were finally on the aircraft headed to Victoria.  And we were not in any danger of missing the concert.  The weekend would go on.  All I have to say, 1) is even when you fly often, don’t forget to double check anything, and 2) you learn a lot about a person’s character through stressful situations.  And I have to say, my cousin has to be one of the best people I know.

NY Resolution: Month 1

Well, I have successfully held to my New Years Resolution for January.

I am 3 weeks through my 5 week dance classes (in case you feel so inclined, here's what I've taken - Lindy Hop and the Blues).  As I finish up these classes, I think the goal will be to keep dancing!  (and by the way, I went last night to the Haiti fundraiser dance after class, it was a hoppin' joint!  As I was leaving I noticed how loud the live band was and how I'm sure the neighbors probably didn't appreciate the music as much as we did inside ;-), I tried to find a website for the band, as they were fantastic, but I was unsuccessful - either way they are the Careless Lovers).

And while I have to say, I've been good about tracking my budget... not so sure it's working as well as I had intended.  I guess that just goes to show me, just since I have a budget, it doesn't mean my finances will improve.  Take for instance my Food budget.  This was a relatively hard one to set up! I mean, there are multiple categories - groceries, fast food, restaurants and the oh-so-evil alcohol & bars.  How much is reasonable for 1 person to spend on groceries in a month?  When do I start saying no to hanging out with friends to stick to the budget or how do I determine what is logical in the first place?!  Hmmmm, which led me to wonder.

What is the balance between going out with friends and being a homebody?

My determination is that being single is ridiculously expensive (and extremely painful to my liver... I think my life is kinda like Man vs Wild, except its Natalie vs Liver).

Over the past month, I've spent as much on food and booze as I have in rent.  Yikes! (Just think how many pairs of shoes that could have been....)  I thought December was bad due to the holidays, and this month would for sure get better...but I guess not.  I rationalize that I will never make friends or meet people in Seattle if I stay home.  And even if I attempt to save money by having friends over, I'm never going to meet the man of my dreams in my apartment (unless Edward magically jumps out of my books (wait I think I just referenced Twilight and Harry Potter in the same sentence, awesome, I'm a teen freak), or I could start a fire to get the fire department there...but I'm kinda guessing either of those scenarios will happen anytime soon).  

I also have friends in Seattle who aren't part of the same groups, so in order to stay in contact with all of them it necessitates going out with all of them separately...(note that in the list below, I haven't had happy hour with coworkers or hung out with Jeanne at all!)

For example, let's review the past few days:
Friday - Date (I'll recap later) - shared a bottle of wine, few drinks - relatively cheap for me, still bad for liver.
Natalie 1, Liver 0
Saturday - Monica's 30th Bday bash w/ Karissa and Lynsey - started out drinking at Lynsey's, moved to Kell's to finish the night off by buying more drinks...hey! some were for others
Natalie 1, Liver 0
Sunday - Met up with Sara for a business meeting...and a couple of beers
Natalie 1, Liver 0
Monday - Dancing - no drinks
Natalie 0, Liver 1
Tuesday - Drinks with Jackie
Natalie 1, Liver 0

Now, I'd say this is pretty common, except, I usually end up paying for alcohol on Friday nights as well, and have spent more than a couple Sundays glued to football at my local sports bars (Buckley's and Spitfire).  I know bartenders by name at both of these, as well as Zig Zag and the Local Vine.  Me, a regular?! Whaaaa?!

I tried thinking back to when I lived in P-town, and I remember spending lots of girls nights at Hillary's, with the occasional dinners at BWW, a few concerts or work outings (with Uncle D covering a lot of tabs... shhh!).  But don't think my spending was that extravagant.  And I think this was mostly because I had a boyfriend, or at least the majority of my girls did...

Which brings me to my conclusion... I spend way too much on alcohol & eating out - trust me the restaurant expense was just as much.  I know, it's a huge revelation, but it's true.  Now... on to figuring out ways to stop it!  Because, while my resolution was to keep a budget, I think I should make it to stick to one instead... :)

So when I'm old, I'll remember all the cool bands I saw...

I've said to myself for awhile now, that I really need to write down all the concerts I've been to, because the list has gotten pretty extensive and I want to document all the bands I've seen.

And because I like things to be organized... I'll start at the beginning (and yes some of these I am embarrassed to admit to):

1. First Concert: The Newsboys, Geoff Moore and the Distance, PlankEye - Memorial Colesium, PDX - 1996 (with Lisa and ...)
2. Point of Grace and 4Him - Memorial Colesium, PDX Apr 1996 (with the church youth group)
3. Carmen - Rose Garden, PDX May 1997 (with the church youth group)
4. Switchfoot, Newsboys, Michael W. Smith, and many more... Jesus Northwest, Aug 1997 (with the church youth group)
5. Amy Grant - Rose Garden, PDX, Dec 2000 (Taylor and ?)
6. Caedmon's Call - Bauman Auditorium, GFU, Newberg, Nov? 2003 (Activities Committee)
7. Pivitplex and The Rock'n'Roll Worship Circus - Bauman Auditorium, GFU, Newberg, Feb 2004 (I had strongly blocked this one from my memory, took some searching to remember those names) (Activities Committee)
8. David Crowder Band - Bauman Auditorium, GFU, Newberg, Apr 2004 (Activities Committee)
9. Pivitplex - Redding, CA, May 2004 (Jen)
10. Shawn McDonald and Pivitplex - July 2004 (Amber and Jen)
11. First Concert by Myself: Jonah 33 - Our Place, Hillsboro, OR, 2004
12. Violent Femmes - Bite of Oregon, PDX, Aug 2005 (Johnny)
13. First Grown Up Concert: Death Cab for Cutie and Franz Ferdinand - Memorial Colesium, PDX, Mar 2006 (Karissa, Hillary and Haley)
14. Smelliest Concert: She Wants Revenge - Berbati's Pan, PDX, 2006 (Kate)
15. Damien Rice - Roseland, PDX, May 2006 (Charles and Jardon)
16. She Wants Revenge - Roseland Theater, PDX, June 2006 (Sara and Alia)
17. Panic! at the Disco - Portland Expo Center, PDX, July 2006 (Hillary, Haley, and Sara)
18. Anna Nalick - Bite of Oregon, PDX, Aug 2006 (Kim)
19. Rocky Votolato - Bumbershoot, SEA, Sept 2006 (Brandon)
20. Zero 7 - Bumbershoot, SEA, Sept 2006 (Brandon)
21. Best.Show.Ever.: The Killers and immigrant - Roseland, PDX, Oct 2006 (Hillary, Cheri, Haley, Jay, Sara, and Brit)
22. The Decemberists - Crystal Ballroom, PDX, Oct 2006 (Kate)
23. Eric John Kaiser and Tahiti80 - Doug Fir, PDX, Nov 2006 (Hillary, Cheri, Kim and Nancy)
24. The Fray - Memorial Coliseum, PDX, Nov 2006 (Hillary, Cheri, Rhoda)
25. Panic! at the Disco - Memorial Coliseum, PDX, Dec 2006 (Hillary and Alia)
26. Augustana and Vega4 - Wonder Ballroom, PDX, Jan 2007 (Ryan)
27. Ok Go! and Snow Patrol - Memorial Coliseum, PDX, Feb 2007 (Hillary and Cheri)
28. The Shins - Crystal Ballroom, PDX, Mar 2007 (Kate)
29. Longest Wait for Headlining Band: Bloc Party - Crystal Ballroom, PDX, Mar 2007 (Hillary)
30. Lexy Dale - PDX, 2007 (Hillary, Alia, Jay)
31. Modest Mouse - McMenamins Edgefield, Troutdale, OR, Aug 2007 (Kate)
32. Rocky Votolato - Showbox at the Market, SEA, Oct 2007 (Morgan)
33. Feist - Schnitzer Concert Hall, PDX, Nov 2007 (Hillary, Cheri)
34. Cold War Kids- Crystal Ballroom, PDX, Nov 2007 (Hillary)
35. Califone and Iron and Wine - Crystal Ballroom, PDX, Dec 2007 (Hillary, Danny, Morgan and Morgan)
36. Editors - Roseland, PDX, Feb 2008 (Hillary and Cheri)
37. Muse - Key Arena, SEA, Sept 2008 (Morgan, Morgan and Jill)
38. Sigur Ros - Benaroya Hall, SEA, Oct 2008 (Morgan, Morgan and Jill)
39. O.A.R. - Paramount, SEA, Jan 2009 (Alia, Nate and Morgan)
40. Rocky Votolato - House Show, SEA, Aug 2009 (me :))
41. Dave Matthews - The Gorge, George, WA, Sept 2009 (Lynsey)
42. Recently Off the Bucket List: Weezer and Blink182 - White River Amphitheater, Endfest, SEA, Sept 2009 (Jay, Brit, Elliot)
43. Furthest Traveled: Damien Rice - Sigur Ros' recording studio, Iceland, Nov 2009 (me)
44. Wolfmother, BestBuy, SEA, Nov 2009 (Karissa)
45. Raphael Saadiq - Showbox at the Market, SEA, Nov 2009 (Karissa)
46. The Sounds - Hawthorne Theater, PDX, Nov 2009 (Hillary)
47. Phoenix - Showbox SoDo, Seattle, Jan 2010 (Karissa)

Upcoming: Jack's Mannequin, Rocky Votolato, Presidents of the United States of America, Tegan & Sara (FINALLY!!), and U2

Still on my Bucket List: Coldplay, The Bravery, Kings of Leon, Damien Rice (again and again), Cake, Spoon,  Paramore, Metric, oh I'm a concert whore... I'll go to any of them :-)